Infinite Willpower
Is willpower finite? Have you ever asked yourself this question? I had not until recently when I read “The Marshmallow Test. Why Self- Control is the Engine of Success” by Walter Mischel, professor Psychology at Columbia University. The book is a fascinating look at the psychology of self-discipline and one’s ability to delay gratification for the benefit of a goal. Mischel’s work began 50 years ago when he studied and subsequently longitudinally followed small kids’ abilities to delay gratification – i.e a cookie now – for the benefit of a better goal; ie 2 cookies later. The book is loaded with “take home” messages; far too numerous to cover here, and the bottom line not surprisingly is that kids who displayed greater self-control with delayed gratification were the ones with stronger performance in college, better jobs, were in happier relationships and enjoyed better health. These findings are intuitive, but nurturing self-control and willpower is what’s most compelling since most of us know the challenges of attenuating will power when facing challenging behavior change.
The forefront of human brains is the Prefrontal Cortex (PFC) and is headquarters for all complex cognitive function related to personal behavior. It’s not fully developed until the early twenties, so if you have a kid in high school or college who’s making questionable decisions, blame it on biology. Mischel describes the PFC as home to “hot” and “cool” thinking which describe impulsive versus mindful / calculated decision making respectively. Willpower relies heavily on turning on the “cool” tap. Two ideas shown to fortify cooler thinking are to concentrate on the desired benefit and to think happy thoughts. If someone were quitting smoking and struggling with a strong urge for nicotine, she might focus on the benefits of being smoke free and concentrate on something she’s looking forward to. Remember the anticipation of a happy event can shift mood benefiting brain chemistry as much as the event itself, which is why I don’t believe in surprise vacations, should anybody be thinking of taking me to Hawaii this winter.
Back to my opening question: is the cooler thinking of willpower limited or infinite? Carol Dweck, author of “Mindset” studied this looking at undergraduates during exams at Stanford. Dweck found that students who theorized that willpower was an unlimited resource fared better academically and emotionally during exams than did their peers who believed they had exhausted their own resources. Could this be a choice? Could we decide we have all that we need and act accordingly? Why the heck not? Years ago the American Cancer Society had the great American Smoke Out which asked smokers to not smoke for one day. One day. One might wonder, “what’s the point in that?” But if one can manage a single day smoke-free, and obviously not perish from the challenge, they can do two days, and so on and so on. If I have the will power to do “X”, why WOULDN’T I have the willpower to do 10 “x”?
Here’s another consideration we know. Stress affects the PFC and diminishes “cool” thinking. Stress makes it so just when we need that cool thinking, it’s harder to find. A veritable one –two punch to progress. So if you’re trying to quit smoking and your undergraduate college son thinks he can ride his bike down the stairs of his dormitory and ends up in the ER with a diagnosis of “dope,” you might find yourself riffling through the trash for a half-smoked butt. His developmentally incomplete PFC might anesthetize yours.
I’m inclined to choose the belief that willpower is unlimited. It’s far more empowering to believe it is. It’s a belief in your ability to accomplish your goals. Focus on the benefits, and opt to think happy thoughts whenever possible. Stress happens and we’ll stumble. Remember, it’s not how many times you fall that counts, it’s how many times you get back up. See you out there.